Giving like Dad this Christmas

Sometimes being the Mom stinks. Moms are the ones that find themselves being compelled to give away a varied array of comforts for the sake of her family. Just as the sun sets, the family has been fed, dishes cleaned and she’s found herself wrapped in warmth on the couch to settle in the for the evening with her favorite dessert, along comes a child salivating at the mouth for that same dessert that she’s been waiting all day to indulge in. What does Mom do? She gives it away. It’s 6 a.m. on Saturday morning, the house is asleep and Mom cuddles in close to Dad, thanking the Lord for quiet moments with her man. Just as soon as Mom begins to fall back off to sleep, she is startled by the loud noise of her children barging into her room and bed. Again, Mom gives away a comfort that her flesh yearns to have to allow someone else to experience a joy that is not hers for a moment. Again and again Mom gives, she sacrifices, she releases so that others have. Though it stinks, she stands so that others can sit, she lends so that others may have, and she suffers when necessary if it means delight for someone she loves.

When one sacrifices, they surrender a possession for the sake of a worthwhile cause. We forego a temporary pleasure for the betterment of another when we sacrifice. Sacrifice is a beautiful word, an act of compassion, and when we witness it many times we’re left speechless. Yet when we sacrifice, it does not feel comforting. It is not enjoyable giving up the warm side of the bed in the middle of winter. Giving away your favorite dessert, even if it is to your firstborn, isn’t all together truly enjoyable. We hold onto things that we don’t want to give away because it is comforting to us and it makes us feel secure. It feeds our pride. Pride is a feeling or deep pleasure or satisfaction that comes from our own personal achievements. When we make the choice not to sacrifice and surrender in order to bless someone else, we nourish our pride.

Is pride a corrupt thing? Doesn’t it benefit a person to think highly of themselves? The kids and I enjoy cuddling up on the couch in the weeks leading up to Christmas, watching as many Christmas-themed movies as possible. Just the other day we watched Thomas Kinkade’s Christmas Cottage which told the story of how Thomas Kinkade became a famous artist. His Mother raised him and his brother while struggling to keep their cottage. She landed into a difficult financial situation. While Thomas urged her to reach out to the community for help so that she could keep her home, her concern was her pride. She told her son, “Please don’t make me ask for help. All I have left is my pride.” Where does our pride leave us? The world will lead you to think that we’re self-sufficient beings, and we have the power within us to be successful. God teaches us otherwise. The book of Proverbs teaches a great deal on pride. “When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with the humble is wisdom” (Proverbs 11:2). “One’s pride will bring him low, but he who is lowly in spirit will obtain honor” (Proverbs 29:23). “The way of a fool is right in his own eyes, but a wise man listens to advice” (Proverbs 12:15). Pride leaves us to live in our own strength, it deceives us, and leads us to corruption. We may reason to ourselves that we can rely on our own strength. We think we know best and we can bring ourselves comfort and peace and joy when we do what we think is best. To give away so that someone else finds joy isn’t fair. We need to take care of our self first, right?

 

Forgiveness is a gift that requires that we become selfless and we give. With forgiveness we are called to give again, and again, and again. Forgiveness requires that we give away the anger we feel, we cease blaming someone else, we give up being resentful and instead we grant another person relief of payment when they owes us something. We do this not for our own welfare, but for theirs. When we forgive we give so that someone else may be comforted, be joyful, experience delight while we suffer. This gift of forgiveness doesn’t sound like it’s very much fun. Instead it promises discomfort.

Why on earth would someone want to subject themselves to such pain and discomfort for the sake of someone else?

Christ provides the ultimate answer. “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.” (Ephesians 4:32) We give in this way because Christ has forgiven us. We could never provide a sufficient enough excuse to not forgive. No hurt, no pain, no trial equates to what Christ suffered and what Christ forgave. While we have sinned against a holy and perfect God, our very best deeds are filthy rags. He has called us to confess our sins and be forgiven.  If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness (1 John 1:9). Day after day, hour after hour, second after second, He forgives and He forgives and He forgives. When we give in this way, God doesn’t simply leave us to our lonesome flesh to do this on our own. While we may can handle giving away our favorite dessert or the warmth of our bed to suffer in the cold, letting go of a hurt and an injustice isn’t as simple. The Lord empowers us with the Holy Spirit to forgive and through the giving of forgiveness we are conformed more into His image. As we give as Christ gave on the cross and as He forgives our sins, we are changed more into His likeness (2 Corinthians 3:18). Peace that surpasses all understanding floods our life when we forgive in this way. There are many times when being the Mom just plain ‘ol stinks and for every time that a Mom gives, she deserves the “best gift giver” award. This Christmas let’s be challenged to be a contender for this award, by giving the gift of forgiveness. Not because the gift recipient deserves it, but because your Heavenly Father calls us to serve, to walk, to give like He did.